going private

so I got a weird comment on the blog, it was in chinese? So I think I will go private just as soon as I can figure out how! If you want to continue to read this, send me an email address so I can invite you, if you are someone I want to invite!

Christmas at our house

Ginger Bread Houses... I think these are about to become targets for the air soft and BB guns! They did have fun making them!

Christmas Eve Donuts. I am actually making Christmas Eve clam chowder, but I am still in kitchen! Madsen thought he was too cool to help with the donuts this year.

Christmas Eve jammies

Christmas morning and dinner. We took more video than pictures. It was a fun holiday. I love the traditions and the excitment of the children and the joy of the season.

The boys had a fun morning and I just loved sitting back watching them tear into their gifts with such gusto!

This year several gifts had sentimental ties that brought a smile to my face. My sister sent See's Candy lollipops just like Grandpa Madsen used to have. My parents found some hamburger relish that they say tastes just like my Grandmother Martindale's chili sauce. I look forward to eating it very soon! We are grateful for the kindness and generosity of all our family and friends.

Mostly we are grateful for the gift of our Savior: his life, his love, and his atonement for all of us.

15 years and counting

December 27, 1994, Denver Colorado

Highlights of our first 15 years....

The best thing we have accomplished these years!

On Sunday Matt and I celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary. It has been a very good 15 years. We have a happy marriage. We love and appreciate each other and we both make sacrifices for each other. We work hard and we play hard. We have changed and grown a lot in these years. We have accomplished and experienced a lot together and look forward to all that is yet to come. We went from a family of 2 to a family of 7, that is the very best thing we have done!

We were looking into the future and thinking of where we will be in 15 years...

Madsen will be 28, hopefully married with children; Sullivan will be 26, also hopefully married with children; Declan will be 23: hopefully finishing school, possibly married; Cannon will be 20, on a mission; Waverly will be 16, the only one at home and hopefully not dating!

I hope we will still live in North Carolina, I hope that our children will have grown up good and happy. I hope Matt advances in his career.I hope we have more good times than hard times. But, most of all, I hope that the next 15 years will be as good, if not better, than the first 15!

Happy Birthday to me!

This is the youngest picture of me we have. Grandpa Martindale is holding me.

Years later.....


Today is my 35th birthday. It has been a good 35 years. I had a wonderful childhood, youth, growing up years with my parents and sisters. I have had 15 really good years being married to Matt and starting, continuing and raising our children. I have had a blessed and happy life. There have been challenges to overcome and more blessings and good things than I can count and name.

I am happy to be 35. I like growing older, realizing that 35 is neither old nor young! I like the wisdom and experience that comes with years. I would not go backwards in time if given the chance! I can look at what I have done and what I am planning to do and see that there is still so much to experience and accomplish.

My visiting teachers asked me if my birthday is hard, turning 35. The answer is nope, I like getting older.

I look forward to raising the kids, seeing them grow and learn and do and become. I look forward to more years with Matt and enoying time with just him when the kids have moved on. I look forward to being a grandma.

I have had 35 great years and hoping for 35 (+) years to come!

So, happy birthday to me!

The first day of winter

Cannon has been looking forward to the first day of winter, December 21. He has been convinced that there will be snow all around because, "it will not be wintery with out snow". The funny thing about this is that he was born in North Carolina! He has never lived in a snowy place to be missing snow! The most snow he has ever seen was our whopping 4 inches in January. This morning he came down stairs and I asked him if he knew what today was. He replied with great enthusiasm, "the first day of winter!" and then ran to the window to see the snow. He said, " look at all the frost! I can tell a difference between snow and frost and that is definitely frost." I am sure he is expecting snow today. He is the only one in the triangle expecting snow.

He also said he can tell the difference between frost and clouds, frost is white, clouds are way up in the sky and grey. He also knows that snow is higher up than clouds and "up in Heaven, because Heaven is way up higher than the clouds."

My Nativities

Mexico

Chile

Russia

Africa

My parents have been traveling the world since retiring and returning from their mission. They bring back nativities from the countries they visit. These are my favorite Christmas decorations. My favorite is the one from Africa. It brings a smile to my face. I just like the whimsical look of the people and the bright colors. Sullivan likes the one from Chile because he thinks it is cool being made from clay out of the ground.

Remembering when...

They were sweet and all I did was love them!

Apex Ham Toss

This morning Sullivan and I competed in our first ever Ham Toss. It is a free-throw shooting contest at our community center. It is for family teams of 2 shooters, 3 rounds of 3 shots each person. The team with the highest score wins a ham. It was pretty laid back and fun. We did not win. I was the only mom shooting. I think I should have been awarded bonus points. I did not do any worse than most of the dads. Sully was not embarrassed by me. His coach was surprised that I was the one there to shoot. There were 2 other families from our ward there. Next year I could spend the whole day at the commuity center shooting free throws with all the boys in all the different age categories. Maybe we could win a ham.

Happy Birthday Waverly!

Waverly is one year old today. What fun we have had with her this year! She is the sweetest thing. I adore her. Her dad adores her. Her brothers adore her. She brings a sweetness and a softness to our home and family. She is very serious, but so silly when she wants to be. She loves to play peek-a-boo, type on the computer, help brothers do dishes, play with blocks, read stories and eat chocolate. She loves to have her picture taken too!

Later tonight we will celebrate her. I am making a triple layer triple chocolate cake for her. She is getting lots of fun stuff! And all of her fun stuff will be wrapped in pink birthday wrapping paper!

Happy birthday my sweet Lady Girl! We love you so!

Responsibilities

I spent an hour in Declan's class this morning for a poetry reading followed by snacks. The kids did a great job with their poems. I took Waverly with me, she causes quite a scene in a third grade classroom. While kids were enjoying snacks after the reading, one little boy was hanging out by me wanting desperately to hold or feed or even just "pet" Waverly. He made me giggle when he asked if he could just pet her. Any way, when I told him no numerous times he said, "do you need to leave so you can get back to work?" I told him no, I do not have a job. The look on his shocked little face was hilarious. Here is the conversation that followed:

boy: you don't have a job? Then how do you get all your money to take care of all your children?

Me: My husband has a job that takes care of the money for us. I take care of the house and kids.

Boy: wow. Not my dad. All he does is sit around the house with no job, so my mom has to work and work and work just so we can have some money. He should go get a job. What do you do?

Me: I clean the house, laundry, cook all our meals, do all the shopping, take care of all the kids. That is my job.

Boy: Your husband should do that stuff.

Me: no, my husband has a job to earn money for us. It is my job to take care of all the other things. When would a dad have time to do all that when he has a job?

Boy: my dad should get a job so my mom can take care of all her children.

The teacher was near during this conversation at first and laughed a little as she walked away. It was a slightly amusing little conversation, unless you look into what this little boy was saying and thinking. He was shocked that I did not have a job and that my husband actually did and that I was happy to take care of all my children. This little boy was wanting what my family has. If only his mother or father had been there to hear him read his poems and over hear this conversation.

It made me grateful for my husband who does work hard to provide for us and who likes having me at home doing my job of taking care of our family. I wouldn't have it any other way.

December, so far

I love new months. Have I said that before? I think I say it every first day of a month. I like to look at a blank calendar and imaging all that is to happen in the next 30-31 days. November flew by and we are cruising through December.

Matt took Monday off, I guess that was still November. We did most of our Christmas shopping for the kids. It was fun. Much more fun with him than on my own. He is better at picking things for the boys than I am. Maybe I will let him do the boys and I will take care of Waverly for the rest of their lives!

Sully started basketball practice and Madsen started play rehearsals.

Matt and I will be celebrating our 15 wedding anniversary on the 27th. We are going to see Phantom of the Opera on Saturday for an early anniversary date. I am looking forward to that.

Waverly will celebrate her first birthday next Friday. She is getting so big too fast. I just adore her.

We are enjoying our December traditions: candy chain countdowns, Christmas story book, and all the activities. I am so glad our schools don't do holiday parties. Makes life that much simpler.

Cannon and Declan are all into Christmas this year. It is fun to watch.

I am looking forward to all the traditions and fun and love of the season.

Thankfuls

I am thankful for Wild Things

Sweet Surprises

Sisters

My Eternal Family

More: My parents who gave me and my sisters such a wonderful childhood and who are the best example of marriage and service and love and so much more.

Matt's parents who raised him to be the man he is

That Matt has a job and I do not

My house, cars and indoor plumbing

Healthy bodies and bright minds

America and all the good it represents

Schools for my children

The gospel: my testimony, the priesthood, a temple just up the road, my Savior

Passing of the torch

This morning I ran the annual Apex Turkey Trot 5k with Madsen and Sullivan. First a few disclaimers: 1. I have not been running so I am way out of shape.
2. I am 35 years old
3. I weigh a good 40 pounds more than I did in high school
4. I just had a baby :) totally joking, a lady I know from the boys school was so impressed with me for running when I just had a baby. I don't think 1 year counts as "just"

With that said, I can not run with my boys. They beat me by a ton. Good for them. Oh to be young again and run with out being weary or having sore legs or think I am going to die after a pathetic 3 miles. The boys did great. I told them that if they did not walk at all I would buy them a treat after the race. I got them frosties at Wendy's. Sullivan was the family champ with a time of 26:11, Madsen said his time was 27 or 28 something, he didn't pay enough attention. Mine will not be published. I am proud of the boys and think that with a little training, they could be good runners. After these races, I am always so ashamed of my times. It is hard not to compare what I used to do to what I can barely accomplish now. Why do I compare a 35 year old, out of shape woman to a 14-18 year old who spent hours running every day? I will never run a 5k in 20 minutes again. I should just try to improve my old lady times. I realized this morning that I really need to start running now, if I plan to run the Cary Road race in April. I know that sounds far away. I can't do a 10k without training. And the only 10k times I have to compare are old lady times. So, once again, starting on Monday, November 30 (I know, I know, it is not the first of the month) I will be running. That way I will have a base endurance level and conditioning ready to start real training for the 10k in January. Who knows, it might help keep holiday pounds off and help me get rid of the 20 I want to get rid of! And, after training for a 10 k that half marathon won't be so bad.

Book Group ?

I am hosting book group at my house this evening. My house is a mess right now. My list of things to do today includes cleaning the house and making a whole bunch of food and some shopping, a parent teacher conference and musical auditions. As I am cleaning I am wondering why am I doing this? The house will remain mostly clean until 3:30. Then I will have to clean it again. Then we will eat dinner and I will have to clean again! All to impress some ladies who most likely wouldn't really care if they showed up and dinner dishes were still on the counter and my carpet was not freshly vacuumed. The most important thing to clean is the bathroom, just in case someone needs it. I guess I am putting on the game face. The one that everyone sees and thinks I have it all together. It is the same face we put on every Sunday. We see each other at our best and judge that. Thinking that this must be how it always is for that lady. Why do we judge our Monday morning selves to someone elses Sunday best? Of course we always see peoples houses clean. I am usually only at other peoples houses when they know I am coming. And they have spent the day cleaning... three times! Stop in unexpected at the house of a family and the house will not be perfectly clean and the mom will not be in her very best clothes looking like she just stepped out of a magazine. That is what I am thinking as I am cleaning my house for my friends. Maybe I should stop and hope they will still be my friends even if there are Star Wars action figures on the floor during book group.

Losing My Baby

I feel like I am losing my baby Why do they have to grow up so quickly? Why do they stop saying cute little guy things and start sounding big? Why do they have to have attitudes? Why do I have to stop doing everything for him and let him do it himself?

I know most of you are looking at this and thinking, Cannon is not the baby. I think of him as the baby, except for Waverly. He was the baby for so long. I have had more fun with this little guy than I got to have with the others when they were very young. It was just a different phase of life, an easier, more pleasant one for me, which made it easier to enjoy my boy. He is growing up. I know this happens when they get into school and their skills just multiply so quickly.

The other day the boys and I were playing a game and it was Cannon's turn. It is one of those games where you have to decide what action to take... he looked at me and said, "Mom, we need to get serious about construction." No baby there.

After his parent/teacher conference I told him that his teacher told him to clean his room. He was a little puzzled by that. He looked me in the eye and said, "do you trust me?" Well, yes I do. I asked him if he trusted me. He asked again if Mrs. Amador really wants him to clean his room and I again said yes, she does. He smiled and said, "you are teasing me."

I took him to school late after a dental appointment and after signing him in and giving him a kiss I watched him walk down the hall with his big back pack full of books (he wants it to be heavy like brothers) with his pass in hand and there was no baby.

Home Sweet Home

This morning I got an e-mail from the realtor I spoke with in April. The house I found that I so desperately want, has dropped $10,000. Too bad for me, it is still just out of reach. I wish I had never seen this house. It makes me crazy that it is sitting there taunting me. It has everything I could ever want or need and is so reasonably priced, especially compared to houses of equivalent square footage. It keeps us in our ward, it gets my kids to the right schools, it has a basement and a huge pantry and a laundry ROOM! not a closet, a room with cabinets. It has 5 bedrooms, 3 bath rooms, a sunroom and a loft. It has the right flooring and counter tops and wood blinds, an intercom so I wouldn't have to yell to get the kids to come down, or up when I need them. It is the perfect house for my family.

The picture is my house. I loved my house when we moved here. It was so much bigger than our tiny Colorado house. We actually had empty rooms, until I bought furniture. I still like my house, it is just too small for my big family. It is a great house for a family with 2 or maybe 3 kids. I love my back yard, so nice and big and fun. My family is growing and my house is not.

I need to remember that I am so grateful to have a house. That I own it, not renting it. That we are cool in the summer and warm in the winter. We have enough space that we all have a place, a crowded smooshed space, but it could be worse.

I am going to just be grateful and not look at the real estate web site. I am going to love my house and clean it and fix it up. I am going to be grateful that I have a big family that I love. I am going to be grateful that my husband has a job. I am going to keep doing all that is asked of me at home, at church and any where else. I am going to keep being faithful and know that Heavenly Father is aware of me and my needs and wants. I am going to be grateful for my challenges, there are a lot worse things than just having house a little too small.

poor me!

Today was a bad day at church and I am frustrated and I want to quit... everything!
My kids were so bad in Sacrament meeting. It drives me crazy when they are like this, I think they are old enough to behave for one hour! I hope the people who were sitting near us will forgive us and still be my friends. Especially since Matt's boss and his family was sharing our pew.

My primary class was particularly out of control today too. They are 10 turning 11, 6 boys and 3 girls. The boys are so disruptive and crazy I am sure the girls do not get anything out of the lesson, the parts that might be heard over the boys or the things I might get to say other than "Dallin and Jacob, will you please stop talking! Rhett and Alex, it is time to listen. Sullivan! Stop it. No, Nash, I will not tell them to stick their noses on the wall..." I really love the kids as kids. As a class, I am about done. I don't know what to do. The harder I try to make the classes more fun and interesting, the more out of control they get. I guess I could have the Bishop come sit in on a class... his son is one of them. Or maybe the 1st counslelor in the Bishopric, his son is also in the class (Sullivan) or maybe the High Priest Group leader, or the Relief Society President... yes, all of the parents of these wonderful boys.

I know this is whimpy and Sundays are challenging for everyone with kids. I had a bad day and it does not help that I am on my own all day. I get to suffer through sacrament wrestling match without my husband. Then I get to suffer through 2 more hours of misbehaving kids to go home and be on my own for a few more hours. Sundays have not been spiritually uplifting or renewing for me for a while. I want a calling where I can go to Relief Society or Sunday school. Anything that makes it so I don't have to be with kids on my own for 3 hours. I am going to have a discussion with a member of the bishopric tonight!

Oh, and Madsen gets in the car and says, " since we do not have scouts this week or school on Wednesday we ( he and his friends) were thinking it would be fun if you would pick us up after basketball practice (church ball) and then we can have a sleep over." Bad timing kiddo! Do not ask your frustrated, whits end mother to have a sleep over! I hate sleep overs. I happen to have the smallest house and the largest family per square foot of Madsen's group of friends. I do not have space for a sleep over any more. I do not want to have 3 extra kids in my house that is bursting at the seems as it is. I told him I would rather have them get together on Wednesday then have them spend the night. He is not happy.

So, I am whining and complaining. I know there are people dealing with harder things than a difficult Sunday. And now I have vented on-line and I will vent when Matt gets home. And next week I will again try my hardest to teach my class and not hurt anyone!

Once in a life time...

This is the only photo of the only time I have and will ever, mow the lawn. I hope you all enjoy it!
I actually thought it was kind of fun. I really do not understand why the boys throw such fits about it. I still will never do it again. I figure I have 4 sons, they can do it. And no, I will not make Waverly mow the lawn. She can if she wants. Even when she is the only one in the house. I will pay a neighbor boy.

New Talents

Waverly has developed some new talents recently. She claps whenever we say yeah, or when she does something cute, which is often! She has learned to climb down the stairs as well as up and she is figuring out edges on the couches so she takes fewer nose dives off of them. She is a little chatter-box, always making some sweet little sound as she plays. Her noises are so different from those of her brothers! Her newest skill is clicking her tongue. She clicks as she crawls along. She also likes music and dances whenever she hears a song. We were shopping the other day and she was shimmying her little shoulders to the music playing through out the store.

She is such a cute little thing. I am glad that she is here!

Family Camp Out

We live just minutes away from a nice lake with great camp sites. Therefore, our ward has an annual fall family camp out. The first year, Cannon was a new baby so I only went for dinner and left the family there. I believe we have been to one since then. It seems like the weekend for the camp out also tends to be an annual rain storm, therefore, said camp out has been cancelled. Last night was this years camp out. It was nearly 90 degrees with an overnight low of 70 with high humidity. People were complaining about it being too hot. We are just never happy, are we? The boys love this event! What could be better than a night out with friends and fire? I really do enjoy camping, but it is so much work for just one night. We bought dinner from Wendy' s, despite Sully needing to cook dinner for his family over a fire to pass off some scout requirement. We have a brand new 3 room/12 man tent. It is huge. We barely got the thing up before it got dark. The boys hated hauling all the gear required for 7 people to spend the night away from home. They quickly startd a fire and the fun began. I did not feel comfortable leaving Declan and Cannon alone with fire while everyone else went to the ward program, so I sat by myself watching them stick sticks in the fire pit. Wave fell asleep with Matt so she went to bed in a wet diaper and her clothes. We visited with friends and finally convinced the boys to put out the fire and go to bed. We mostly slept. Wave did wake up but Matt took care of her and I fell back asleep! Yay me! The High Priests made breakfast and we packed up and headed home. And the boys got to enjoy hauling all the gear from campsite to car and from car to house.

I thought it was funny how many times I heard parents discussing how much effort this one night is and asking, "why do we do this?" I asked myself the same thing. This is what I decided the answer is:
1. It is a tradition: those who have been here for awhile would be upset if it did not happen
2. The kids love it: it is a lot of effort and I would happily stay home. But, the kids love it, so we go.

We had a perfectly pleasant evening. The drive home is about 15 minutes. The boys were good and helpful.

I can't wait for the Father/Son camp out in the spring. That is my favorite!

To Trophy or not to Trophy...

Sully is in goal

funny picture, but it is hard to get a good picture of him doing something really cool!

Trophies for everyone!
And this is where my problem starts. None of these pictures are from this soccer season. I actually have not taken any, how many pictures of the back side of my kid in a jersey do I need? This years team has been really bad, 0-6 so far. It has been frustrating for Sully who really is quite good and certainly the best on his team. The coach is terrible, glad he was willing to do it, since we don't, but not happy to have him be Sully's coach again. They have scored 3 goals- all season. They have lost by huge margins. It is not very fun to watch, except when Sully is in goal, then he gets a lot of action and he is good. It has not been fun to play either. He is so ready for this to be over and we are looking into different options for next season. Unfortunately, all the club leagues play on Sunday and are really expensive and travel all over which are 3 things we can not do. This season is finally almost over. I got an e-mail from the coaches wife about the end of season celebration and thoughts on trophies, to trophy or not to trophy, that is the question. I am of the opinion that trophies are for teams that WIN! Not all this everyone is a winner and no one should feel bad stuff. This team is the worst in the league! They did not win anything! Why do we then buy, yes, we would be paying, trophies? To remember the awful season? Because Sully needs something else to clutter up his dresser and collect dust? Because we all just need some other way to spend money? So, we talked with Sully and he laughed at the whole thing and said he does not want a trophy for this team/season. Apparently, we are not the only ones on the team who feel this way. We are opting out of trophies. But wait! One mother did reply that something needs to be given to each kid because of their great effort and team work. Whatever. So, the plan is to print some computer certificate and have the coach say something nice about each kid at our lunch party after the first round tournament losing game. If I was the coach, I would have a hard time sayingsomething good about each kid.... good thing I am not the coach! Heaven forbid we let winners be winners and celebrate an accomplishment or for that matter, let losers be losers and walk away.